The Ex Factor” is a program by breakup and divorce coach Brad Browning. Released in 2016, it came in two versions: One for men, and one for women. It covered one of the most perennially-asked questions in dating and relationships. And that is how to get your ex back.
In this review, we’ll talk about the men’s version of “The Ex Factor.” We’ll cover how well it helps men get their ex-girlfriends back. We’ll look at the good, the bad, and the ugly. And we’ll see how it stands against our “gold standard” in relationship programs.
Ex Factor Guide: The Positive
#1: It’s packed with value. Brad Browning’s ebook alone (not counting its many bonuses) has about 160+ pages. It’s filled with fairly good advice from one of the most successful breakup coaches out there.
The entire guide is divided into 14 chapters, which run the gamut of the breakup and mending process. The topics it covers range from:
- The reasons WHY the reader’s ex left
- How to become more attractive
- A full eight chapters on the actual process of getting her back
The impression it made on me was that even if the reader didn’t get his ex back, he’d still end up with lots of value from the book. He’d be a better, more attractive guy, and maybe his next relationship will be better than the last.
#2: It’s easy to read. I’ve slaved through dating books and ebooks with “rivers of text” that were hard to read. The Ex Factor wasn’t one of them. It’s written in a casual, informational way. It allows the reader to pause at certain parts, reflect, perhaps fill up an action list, and then move on.
#3: The “Six Deadly Sins” was on point. In Chapter 3, the book covered what it called the “Six Deadly Sins” in a relationship. While they were more like the symptoms of an underlying condition, they were very much on point. I couldn’t stress the importance of every man knowing about it.
The Six Deadly Sins were:
- Being way too controlling, or putting weird and unrealistic constraints on your partner
- Having low self-esteem, or being self-deprecating and being serious about it
- Being “clingy” or always needing attention, which is a sign of a low-value, low-power man
- Being jealous all the time, which tells your partner you think she’s more valuable than you. (This is one of the biggest attraction killers out there)
- Seeking external validation. This is basically caring what other people (especially your partner) thinks of you
- Cheating, which is just a childish way of “getting back” at your partner
#4: The “Experts Weigh In” sections. Sprinkled throughout the Ex Factor are pages where “experts weigh in.” That is, other professionals in the breakup coaching space give their own opinions. They give additional tips, different perspectives, and answer frequently-asked questions.
It lends to Brad Browning’s trustworthiness to feature these other experts in his book. More importantly, it gives the reader a more holistic understanding of the process. I do, however, feel that some of these interviews are made for the purpose of selling the programs of those experts.
Ex Factor Guide: The Negative
The Ex Factor Guide does have some drawbacks. We’ll talk about some of the bigger ones in this review.
The first one is that it’s too cumbersome. As an example, the first four chapters leads the reader down a path of self-improvement. For those who are in desperate situations to recover their relationships or marriages, this is a chore. (This is a common problem with many “pickup” or “dating guru” products, such as the Girlfriend Activation System, for example. Too much filler and rehashed information, and not enough specific and unique knowledge.)
I understand the book’s good intentions. But I also know that significant self-improvement can’t be achieved in a matter of weeks or months. Instead, it’s a whole lifestyle change. It takes an excruciating amount of time and energy, which you might not have when you’re trying to get your ex back.
Worse, the emphasis on self-improvement might also cause more failure than success. If you’ve tried any form of self-improvement in the past, then you know how easy it is to “fall off the wagon” after a few days.
This is a critical drawback when the reader has a specific outcome he wants to achieve (i.e. get his ex back). After a few days, he realizes he can’t pull off some of the things in The Ex Factor’s earlier chapters. He gets discouraged and decides: “You know what, screw it – if I can’t do even this, I probably can’t do the rest.”
In my opinion, The Ex Factor should have reversed its structure. The process of getting an ex back should have gone FIRST, followed by self-improvement.
What’s more, the book correctly identifies the problem as a lack of mutual attraction. The book also correctly identifies the solution as the creation of new attraction. However, it might have failed to note that attraction has an “expiry date.” That is, getting an ex back requires speed. There is no time for excessive pondering and “strategizing” (which seems to be what this ebook recommends).
The cumbersome nature of The Ex Factor might have defeated its purpose. Instead, it lends itself better to a different goal, such as starting a new relationship with a new woman.
Ex Factor Guide: The Ugly
Lastly, what I didn’t like about The Ex Factor was that on the whole, it’s too “preventive.” That is, it’s more about keeping your ex-girlfriend from leaving you again. It’s not nearly as much about making her actually WANT to stay. To me, that’s a huge red flag.
It makes the reader presume that at any given time, his ex is leaning towards leaving again. And so he has to work hard to keep her. As you can imagine, over a course of months or years, that’ll involve a LOT of work. And that’s a discouraging thought.
Personally, my idea of a good relationship is one where your woman has absolutely no desire to leave. Imagine that for a moment. How much easier would your relationship be if she never wanted out? How much more could you achieve in life?
And my idea of getting your ex back would be to make her realize she made a HUGE mistake in leaving you. So she comes back to you and never, ever regrets doing so.
Ex Factor Guide vs The “Gold Standard“
If you’re new to my reviews, let me fill you in. My current “Gold Standard” for relationship programs is Shogun Method by Derek Rake. It has been for about six years running, and for reasons I’m about to list in this section. (Read the review of the Shogun Method program here)
According to Derek, solving relationship problems is all about ease, quickness, and results. The Ex Factor is about improving yourself in order to get your ex back. Meanwhile, Shogun Method is about getting your ex back WHILE improving yourself.
This is a big difference, and that’s why I feel The Ex Factor falls short of my lofty gold standard. In the end, any diligent reader of The Ex Factor will come out a better man through and through, and that’s a good thing. It just takes too long, and time is crucial when it comes to getting an ex back.
I’m left with this impression. If you followed The Ex Factor to the letter, you’d end up a better and more attractive man, BUT you won’t get your ex back. Or maybe you will, but you’ll spend an inordinate amount of time and energy trying to keep her. And she’ll leave you again in the end anyway.
There’s also the issue of Contextual Rapport, which Shogun Method covers but The Ex Factor doesn’t. Contextual Rapport is the “context” by which a woman puts her interest or attraction in you. Ideally, you want the “context” to be romance and sexual desire.
Unfortunately, The Ex Factor’s approach is to make you a more INTERESTING man. That’s liable to make your ex see you as a friend that adds value to her life instead of a lover she wants to get back with.
And that, I think, is the downfall of this program.
Ex Factor Guide Review Verdict: Yes Or No?
The Ex Factor Guide is one of the most well-known “get your ex back” program available today. It’s got Brad Browning and other experts in the space weighing in. It’s hard to find a more complete guide on rekindling a broken relationship and starting over.
Unfortunately, its strength is also its weakness. In practice, comprehensiveness translates to slowness, and slowness leads to missed opportunities. Since you have a very tiny window of opportunity when trying to get your ex back, this is a significant drawback.
To anyone reading The Ex Factor – I suggest you highlight the tips that are doable and ignore the rest for now. Put a game plan together and put it into action as soon as possible. Time is of the essence!
I would recommend The Ex Factor most highly to a very specific audience. These are men who want to improve themselves AND try to get their exes back… but are actually okay either way if they get her back or not. For such men, The Ex Factor can be a fairly good resource. (Even if it stumbles in achieving the intended outcome.)
On the other hand, if you want all of that AND make your ex want to stay with you forever… and do it FAST, before it’s too late… then I recommend you take the faster, more pragmatic approach of Shogun Method.